The Rebel's Vision Read online

  No…

  Alchan didn’t move as he realized exactly what his brother’s problem was, even if he would never hear an admission from Luykas.

  He’s related to the woman who abused her for centuries. She must have said something when she projected to him. He wasn’t nearly so hung up on this before.

  He’d never been one to meddle in the relationships of the Andinna around him, since he had no experience in the field. He’d never wanted to get into that sort of drama. His aunts, the daughters of the last Queen, were all meddlers. They had tried to work their magic to get all of their children into relationships that would last. When they finally made it to him, he conveniently made himself unreachable. He had been five hundred, and a bedru for every single day of his life. He’d lost hope of changing, and unlike his father, he didn’t have it in him to share even a moment of any potential lover’s time. He was more dominant and aggressive than his father could ever dream.

  But he sat next to Luykas, wanting to fix his brother’s problems and heal the broken male from his childhood. Luykas was always as fucked up as he was.

  “Is that him? The misbegotten love child Behron decided to leave in the Empire? Poor child.” His mother had been angry with her husband and pitied the boy.

  “Yes, and he’s a member of this family. It’s not his fault his father is a lazy, good-for-nothing disgrace upon us.” His grandmother made it clear from day one, Luykas wouldn’t be treated as an outcast. But their kindness could never stop the whispers. The maids talked, so did the mativas of Anden and the noble houses.

  “Half-Elvasi. He’s never going to amount to anything within the royal family. He can’t. Only purebloods can claim the mystical royal power and pass on the line.” The maids weren’t kind.

  “He’s handsome in his own way, but he’s just as dominant as his brother. Who would ever want to deal with a male who doesn’t understand submission?”

  Alchan shoved the memories aside. Neither of them had ever been found suitable as anything except warriors. They had been destined to fight and die like good males of the royal family who had no chance at the throne or passing on their own lines.

  And now, look at us. I need to have children and quickly. Luykas is considered one of the greatest military minds of our people and has a blood bond with the most dominant female currently of our generation. Still, both fucking it all up.

  “She’s your friend,” Alchan said carefully, not wanting to upset the male leaning on his shoulder. Not because he was scared of Luykas. He didn’t want to hurt his brother with words that weren’t well thought out. “She knows you’re loyal to me and the Andinna. She knows you broke her away from Shadra’s grasp. Trust her to value the friendship.”

  Luykas made a noise of derision and stood up, going back to his pacing.

  “It’s not just Mave,” he snapped. “It’s everyone. How long have you and I been keeping this secret from everyone? Everyone else who knew is dead. We never told anyone in the Company when we had centuries to do it. Now, it’s dirty.” Luykas was growling as he spoke, a low rumble in his chest that worried Alchan. He needed his brother to remain the calm one. He relied on the level head of the dominant mutt. “Nevyn and Varon deserved to know long ago, so did Leshaun. Hell, all of them deserved to know. How do I tell them now?”

  “I don’t know,” Alchan answered, feeling the weight of the problem.

  The identity of Luykas’ mother had never been common knowledge. It was told to the highest members of the royal family, and General Lorren was the only one outside of the family who knew. When the War started, it became imperative to keep it a secret to keep Luykas safe.

  Since then? He and Luykas had thought it was safer being the last two to know. They didn’t want anyone to attack Luykas in retaliation for the loss of the War. Alchan didn’t want his brother hurt.

  “We should have told them sooner,” he declared. “I’m sorry for not thinking of this possibility sooner.”

  “She could blackmail me with it. I’m lucky she didn’t when she decided she wanted to talk to me before I made it out of her range.” Luykas began to laugh, a keening, mad laugh, not full of humor but full of despair. “She’ll figure out she can soon enough, though.”

  “We’ll figure it out,” Alchan snapped. He hated seeing his brother like this. Something about it was wrong. It felt off and uncomfortable. “You will not let that bitch drive you away from me or anyone else, do you understand me?” Alchan stood up and grabbed his brother by the shoulders. “In the end, I’m the one in charge here, and this is a direct order. You will remain by my side. Forever. You are the last family I have. We will work the rest out.”

  Luykas nodded silently.

  Alchan wanted to shake his brother.

  “How long have you been harboring these feelings?” He gave into the urge. Luykas let his head wobble back and forth, making Alchan more upset. “Answer me, damn it.”

  “Since she astral projected to me. She knows she can hurt me. She knows she can use this to hurt us. Why do you think I wanted a home on your cliff? What if she was finally able to get through and others saw? I need to be separated from them, Alchan. I have to be.”

  “So, the last time we spoke before I left on the mission, you were feeling like this and didn’t tell me? You’ve been wallowing in this for months and never told me?”

  “You knew something was bothering me.”

  Alchan snarled at that excuse. Yes, he had known something was eating at his brother but had thought it was something smaller, old childhood wounds reopened, not a full crisis of faith on his brother’s part.

  “I’m sorry,” Luykas muttered. “I wanted time to figure out what to do about it. Now, I’m sure she won’t be able to see any secure information from me or make her possible presence known to any other Andinna. I can’t even go on missions south of the Spine. I’m worthless just like he—”

  Worthless.

  Alchan shoved a fist into his brother’s gut, harder than he should have. Luykas doubled over, groaning as he fell to his knees.

  “What the fuck?” his brother demanded.

  “If you ever say that word to me again, I’ll fucking chain your ass to me and make you fucking work within an inch of your life, every day until you go gray. Do you fucking understand me? You are not worthless. We aren’t worthless.”

  Gold eyes turned up to him, wide and apologetic.

  “I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I…”

  “You will not use that bastard’s words to hurt yourself,” Alchan snapped, trying to shove down the boy in his heart, screaming to get out. The boy who had a father who didn’t love him, the boy who didn’t know what it meant to have a real family until his brother showed up. His mother loved him. So did her other husbands, even if they never acted as his fathers, the way Andinna culture intended. He was the royal child and couldn’t possibly be theirs. His mother wasn’t a royal, and once it was discovered he was, even she lost the power to make certain decisions in his life.

  He was left with his bitter, angry father for most of his childhood.

  Worthless.

  “You are not worthless. There’s a lot we need to accomplish for this rebellion to work. I can handle things south of the border. It’s dangerous, and eventually, I’ll move to send Mave and Nevyn in my place. Then I’ll be stuck here too. But I’m still the King of the Andinna and you are still my brother and a trusted advisor with an understanding of our enemy. We are not worthless.”

  “We’re not worthless,” Luykas repeated back to him.

  “Come here,” Alchan ordered, helping his brother back to his feet. Before Luykas could get away, Alchan threw his arms around him and held him. Alchan hated hugs, despised physical contact with that much intimacy, but this was his brother, and he was being hurt by a mother he had no choice in having. “You will tell me if you feel this way again. I am always willing to remind you that you mean something to someone. We’re going to figure this out. She won’t be able to use he
r relation to you against us.”

  “Will you let me decide how to proceed with this?” his brother asked softly, limp in the hug. Luykas always responded that way when he was hugged, never reciprocating the contact but accepting by leaning his head down onto Alchan’s shoulder. A white horn brushed his cheek. There was a time when they couldn’t do this because that white horn threatened to punch a hole in him. As they grew up, their horns had been in a dangerous place, sharp and short, easy to stab someone with.

  “Consider it your priority. In the end, it’s your secret,” Alchan reminded him. “Now, are we going to sit out here all night?”

  “I like to look at the stars. I forgot how different the sky was between Anden and Olost.”

  “In Olost, you can’t see the Dragon,” Alchan agreed. He released his brother and looked up. He hadn’t looked for it in over a thousand years, but he found it easily enough and pointed. “There it is.”

  “What dragon do you think they meant for it to be?” his brother asked. “Lariana? One of her husbands, the elemental males? Or Kristanya?”

  “Anyone but Amanora, I hope,” Alchan answered with a snort. “Though if you ask Varon, he’ll say it’s Amanora.”

  “He was a priest in her name. He’s biased, but then, so are we.”

  Alchan sighed. He knew Varon was a priest of their goddess of love, fertility, and the arts. The male had the same posture and walk the rest of them had. Alchan had fucked enough of those types of priests in his life to recognize it immediately when he’d met the male at a camp during the War, working with some of the greatest warriors of their people, of which he was one as well.

  “Who do you want it to be?” Alchan asked. “I think of Lariana. She’s my patron goddess, even if my personality is more suited for Kristanya.”

  “She’s mine, too,” Luykas reminded him. “I bear her color. There’s no denying that somewhere in my half-breed blood, I’m a royal Andinna.”

  Alchan nodded. Legend had it that mutts portrayed the colors of gods or goddesses influential in their families. Every mutt had one of the primary dragon’s colors, which was the source of the myth. Luykas was the only white winged Andinna in history, but he was also the only mutt born with royal blood. Whether it added credence to the myth or was completely unrelated, he didn’t know, but Alchan always liked to think those white wings meant his brother truly belonged with him and in his Andinna family, even if he could never hold the throne or have heirs for it.

  “Aside from Varon and his devotion to Amanora, the rest of them probably pray to Kristanya,” Alchan continued, thinking of the members of his guard, his Company. “Which suits them all.”

  “Mave doesn’t pray,” Luykas said softly. “Then again, neither do I.”

  “Heathens, both of you,” Alchan said in his attempt to tease his brother. “Meant for each other heathens.”

  Luykas growled softly.

  They sat quietly for a long time, staring up at the stars, just as they had growing up. Alchan had taught Luykas everything about the night sky in the way the Andinna knew it. He had been forced to learn it from his own education. One night, he’d caught Luykas staring at the sky.

  “I don’t know the stars here. I pointed out an Elvasi constellation to a teacher, and she whacked me with her stick.”

  “I can teach you.”

  “Please?”

  They had sat for hours, going over the stars important to Andinna legend. It was the first long conversation they’d had.

  Luykas gasped suddenly, and Alchan jumped at the sudden noise.

  “Mave,” his brother whispered. “She’s scared. Moving.”

  “Is she in any real danger?” Alchan demanded. Damn it. If Mave was being attacked, no one in the village was safe.

  “No…” Luykas sighed. “This has happened before.”

  “What’s wrong?”

  “I don’t know. She never tells me,” his brother said in a faraway voice. He was focused on the bond.

  “Go check on her,” Alchan ordered. “Let me know what you learn. And later, you’ll explain to me how this has ‘happened before,’ and I didn’t know.”

  “See you. Thank you for tolerating me tonight.”

  “Always, brother,” he said as Luykas launched into the sky.

  Alchan didn’t worry about Mave knowing Luykas was on his way to check on her. With her background, it could have just been a nightmare that opened old wounds. Every Andinna who lived a warrior’s life had those nights.

  He didn’t stay at the river, taking off to head home. Without Luykas, there was no reason to stay up all night.

  He landed easily on his front porch and stepped inside, glad to see the only pair of boots by the door were Rainev’s. There were no other unexpected late-night guests for him to deal with. He pulled off his boots and kicked them aside, then unbuckled his belt and hung it up on a convenient hook Rain had installed.

  The fire was dead in the family room, leaving his home dark. He padded into the kitchen and proceeded to get himself something light to fill his stomach.

  “’Ello?” someone mumbled in the family room. Alchan sighed and looked back out into the room and saw Rain trying to sit up on one of the cushions. “Where’s Alchan? I need to…see the King…”

  The deep blue eyes didn’t know what they were seeing. Alchan knew the distant, strange look of a sleepwalker when he saw it. Some Andinna, normally mutts, had a problem with sleep walking when…

  Lyca. I let him drink lyca tea and didn’t consider this. Skies damn it, I just want to go to sleep.

  Alchan put down the small biscuit he was holding and marched out into the family room, gently lifting Rain to his feet.

  “Where’s the King?” the young male asked, his words slurred. “Do you know?”

  “I do,” he answered softly. “Follow me.”

  He knew from experience with Luykas that trying to reason with a sleepwalker was foolish. Rain didn’t realize he was the King, and there would be no way to convince him otherwise. He mentally filed away that Rainev couldn’t have lyca tea like Luykas. He would have to tell the young male in the morning it was unsafe. Sleepwalking for their people was inherently more dangerous than it was for other races. There was too much of a risk for sleep flying, and that was fatal.

  At least he’s here with me instead of stuck in the barracks where the single males would only fuck with him. I can deal with this. I can protect him.

  His family had no idea what unique problems mutts faced, but Alchan made sure to learn everything to help his brother know what was and wasn’t safe for him. They weren’t pure Andinna and couldn’t eat or drink certain things grown in Anden, but there was no book on the matter. Most families had to learn on their own, and his had been no exception.

  He was able to direct Rainev to his room and helped him lie down.

  “He’s here? Alchan is here?” Rainev asked, confused.

  “He’ll meet you soon. He’s in an important meeting with his brother, Luykas,” Alchan explained. He brushed Rain’s black hair off the young male’s eyes and was struck by the attractive way they sparkled in his sleepy, half-lidded gaze. “He’ll be back by morning,” he managed to choke out. A fierce, crushing need to protect tried to claim him.

  I can protect him.

  “That’s right. Luykas. Safe with Luykas.” Rainev nodded, his eyes already drifting closed.

  Alchan let those words sit, not answering them as he watched Rainev’s breathing slow, and sleep finally took him again. By the time Alchan made it back to his room, he was exhausted. He fell into his bed and stared at the ceiling. He couldn’t go to sleep, thinking of Rainev’s eyes.

  6

  Mave

  Mave wandered through the forest, surrounded by silence. No birds chirped and sang, no nearby stream filled the air with its own music, and no distant chatter of Andinna could be heard through the trees.

  It was both comforting and eerie, both unfamiliar and normal.

  Mave found hers
elf locked inside another dream.

  Like every time she had this dream, there was only one path for her to follow. Where it led, she never knew, but she continued to walk it. There were no other footprints on the path, no sign of other travelers.

  She opened her mouth, trying to speak and nothing came out. She could barely string two words together in her thoughts. All she could do was walk. When she could glimpse over the treetops, she saw mountains—Anden mountains. She was careful not to look ahead as she gazed at the vistas around her. Once she looked ahead, it would end. After seeing this dream so many times, she was tired of it ending before she understood anything about it.

  She couldn’t resist for long, though. Something dragged her head to turn and look down the path as she walked until she entered a clearing.

  There in the middle stood her worst fear, something that shocked and scared her every time she saw it.

  The figure stood in the path, curved morok in hand, the ancient weapon of choice for the Andinna. It had an elegant pair of horns spiraling out from its head. Armor made the sex undefinable. Its tail lashed around in anger or annoyance, which one she could never tell.

  But none of that was striking.

  This foe had no wings. It stood with pride but had no wings.

  It roared and ran for her, sword held high. Mave tried to jump for the sky, realizing she had no weapons of her own.

  And realized she had no wings either.

  “Fuck,” Mave gasped as she woke up, her eyes flying open. The dream is back. I should have known it would come back the moment I got home. That has to be the fourth time I’ve had it since settling in this village, skies damn it.

  It was the number one reason she lost sleep. Even when she wasn’t getting the dream, she went to sleep, and the fear of being grounded, of losing her wings, haunted her. Some nights, she was scared to close her eyes, scared to be confronted by the possibility of seeing it again.

  She pushed up, glad she wasn’t too tangled with Matesh to get up and move around. He snored softly, completely oblivious to her activities. She threw on a pair of leather breeches, grabbed a simple chest wrap top, and stumbled out of the room, leaving her lover among the furs and blankets that were their bed. She threw on the wrap in the hall, glad Zayden wasn’t up to see her with her breasts hanging out. She pulled on her boots at the door, grabbed her small bag, and staggered outside in a rush. She nearly went over the edge of her porch but was able to find her feet and make it down the stairs. Like Alchan, she also had a home close to the ground again.